Home
by Bella.Diggory
Summary: Katniss is with Gale, but she loves Peeta. She can't stop thinking about him, or remembering their time together in the cave with longing and desire. But she doesn't want to hurt Gale, but all Gale wants is her honesty. Katniss/Peeta, Three-Shot
1. Part I: In the Cave

**Disclaimer: **I do not own The Hunger Games.

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**Home**

Part I: In the Cave

**Katniss's POV**

It is dark, and damp, and cold in the cave – _our_ cave hidden behind a mesh of rocks, sticks and leaves. Water leaks in through the small hole left open, serving as our only exit and entrance at the base of the camouflage wall I put together. I shiver through the darkness, though I do not know why. The sleeping bag alone keeps in more than enough heat for one person, but with two – myself and Peeta – it makes it almost warm enough; comfortable enough to make it seem like we are back at home, asleep in our own beds. Almost.

Peeta's arms pull me tighter into him, and I nuzzle my head against his shoulder as he runs a hand over my hair asking softly. "Are you cold?"

"No," I tell him after a moment. "I'm fine," I slide my legs closer to his, and ball up a small handful of his shirt as he winds his feet with mine. "Peeta," I call out softly as I close my eyes and scoot my hips and stomach against his, turning my head ever so slightly until our cheeks touch.

"Yes?" he asks me as he slowly runs his hand in a small vertical line along my back.

"What?" I ask as I force myself to open my eyes and look into his.

"Peeta," he tells me as he brushes a strand of hair away from my forehead, and I knit my eyebrows together curiously. "You said my name."

"Oh," I say softly as I pull my gaze away from his and look down at his chest. "I guess I," I begin as I run my fingers lightly over his shirt, never meeting my eyes with his. "I guess I just wanted to hear your name."

"Katniss," he whispers softly, pulling my eyes up to meet him with his voice alone.

"Yes?" I ask him, and find my hand has made a mind of its own and is caressing itself up his chest, and over his collarbone until it finds itself comfortably resting, cupped, against his exposed neck.

"I just wanted to hear your name," he whispers, almost inaudibly as he slowly leans his forehead against mine, where he rests it for a while and keeps my head cupped in his hand. I trail my eyes along every curve, every inch of his face, drinking everything in as I reach my hand and trace my fingertips over his cheeks, chin, nose, temples, lips – everything – until finally pulling my hand away and resting it against his chest. Closing my eyes I lay there in his arms, our legs intertwined as I think to myself what all of this means as he pulls his hand – hidden away beneath the sleeping bag – from my back and cups my hand and his, stroking the back of it with his thumb.

I inhale a deep breath through my nostrils and hold it in until my lungs scream for fresh oxygen and wonder. "Peeta – the boy with the bread – is holding me, so easily and so comfortably. And I am letting him. Why am I letting him? Because we need to own the whole star-crossed-lovers number? To stay alive? To get sponsors?" I think, softly sucking my lower lip into my mouth and biting it gently. "Can that really be all that this is? Peeta, the boy who I have thought about everyday of my life since I was twelve-years-old… Why did it have to be his name to get drawn during The Reaping? Why? Why!

"He is literally the only reason I – Mom and Prim – are still alive. If it hadn't been for him we would have starved, and now, here I am, laying in a cave with him so close, acting as if there is no danger – none at all – waiting for us just outside the cave…"

His lips pressing against mine pull me from my thoughts. I open my eyes as he pulls his lips from mine, watching, waiting, seeing how I will react. Without words, with only a look, I lace my fingers with his and bring our entwined hands up so they rest between our hearts, and he slowly leans his lips back into mine and kisses me. His lips are warm and soft, full as they massage against mine. I have never been kissed before, but I can't imagine it ever feeling any better than it does now.

I lean my head into his as he pulls his lips from mine, and reluctantly rest my head back against his shoulder and look over at him with longing in my heart. "What is it?" he asks with concern plaguing his expression as he runs the blades of his fingers from the top of my hairline and down the length of my face to my jaw. I hadn't noticed, but at his words I blink and feel a warm tear run down the side of my face and notice other tears – not yet fallen – clouding my vision.

"Nothing, it's just-" I hesitate.

He brings his lips to my forehead and says, "Tell me."

"When you were kissing me, it was…" I breathe, closing my eyes and realizing that what I am saying is not for the viewers watching, but for Peeta and Peeta alone. "It was the best feeling that I have ever felt, and I couldn't… I couldn't imagine it being the last time, because it can't be… it just can't…" I trail, being unable to express myself in words any further, and being jealous that Peeta can speak so freely – his ability to be able to say one word, one sentence and be able to express every emotion he is feeling – it is a gift. It is rare, and I am envious. I can take down a small bird in flight with one arrow – easy. But be able to express how I am feeling? Now _that_ is difficult…

"If it is," he whispers as he cups my chin in his hand, and I open my eyes to look up at him – tears still clouding my vision. "Then let's not waste another second…"

I am unable to say anything else as he closes the distance between our lips.

TBC


	2. Part II: Be Happy

**Home**

Part II: Be Happy

**Katniss's POV**

My eyes flutter open and I let a small groan escape my lips. My right knee is throbbing and my head is pounding so severely it affects my vision, causing stars and double-vision. I lay with my back against the cold and wet forest floor and reach my hand up to my head and feel the warm, thick blood against the tips of my fingers before seeing it. A small tear of frustration escapes the corner of my eye as I wait for the dizziness and stars to diminish before pulling myself up to sit.

"Peeta," I think as I force myself up, uncaring of the blinding pain in my head and throbbing pain of my knee. "Please leave me alone. _Please._ I know we had our moments in the arena, but I am with Gale now, so these constant thoughts of you, these memories - dreams – of you, they've got to stop," I force my eyes to look at the once-faithful fallen tree-log above me and glare at the remains of the branch that once stood so firm and solid, now scattered in rotted-shards all around me.

"You were intruding my thoughts again," I think as I let out another grunt of pain as I pull myself back to my feet, nearly screaming at the pain as I put pressure on my knee. "You see why this must end? I can't even hunt properly anymore because all I'm focused on is you… At least if I were thinking of Gale I'd know how to focus on the animals I'm hunting. I'd be more concerned about one-upping him than on how good kissing feels."

I clench my teeth together as I limp across the forest floor, reaching out and grabbing onto any greenery which shows any sign of strength to support my body weight to help me along. "Stupid rock," I say aloud as I think back to my fall, and how utterly inconvenient it was to have a rock so perfectly placed beneath the fallen tree for my head to land on. "Dammit, dammit, _dammit!_" I scream as I tumble to the ground, being unable to force my knee to bear anymore pressure. "Stupid, stupid!" I curse at it while cupping it between my hands. Whatever hit it tore a large rip in my jeans, and blood is soaked halfway down to my shin. "Come on Katniss," I say to myself as I force myself back to my feet and trek on. "You were in the Seventy-forth annual Hunger Games. You lived when twenty-two other people faced imminent, brutal deaths. You can make it home with an injured knee and headache."

Slithering myself through the break in the fence is no picnic. I nearly fall onto my face twice and get my torn jeans caught on a loose bit of wire, widening the already-enormous gap at the knee. I throw my hands out to stop myself falling the second time and call out as a shard of glass stabs into my palm. "This is just not my day," I moan as I rip the glass from my flesh and shove it angrily into my pocket and wince as a rush of deep-red blood spurts from the wound.

I let out a burst of laughter as I reach the Victors Village, thinking how ironic it is that I was able to do more harm to myself in a day at my own home than twenty-two blood-thirsty armed strangers could do to me in two weeks. "Take that, Capitol," I think as I limp my way up the front steps to my house, squeezing my hand tightly around the railing. "I bet you'd love to have the cameras on me now…"

As I push open the front door I flip on the lights and begin kicking off my shoes, but before I am able to get to the second foot I am bombarded by both Gale and Peeta who seem to come out of nowhere.

"Katniss!" Gale howls out as he takes my face into his hands and examines my forehead. "What happened to you?" Peeta has my injured hand held in his and is examining it with as much force as Gale is my head. Frustrated, I rip my hand away from Peeta's and pull myself away from Gale's hold.

"I'm fine!" I spit as I clasp my hands together and look between the two of them. "I just had a little accident in the woods, it's nothing," I say. "I can take care of myself."

"I can see that," says Gale with a humored smile, nodding with his hands on his hips.

I glare at him a moment before limping away from the pair and head to the kitchen, where I flip on the lights and hobble towards the kitchen counter. I struggle to hop onto the counter – due to my knee – and am about to give up as I feel a pair of hands lift me up. Thinking it is Gale I ready myself to call out my protests; I can do it myself, but as I turn my head I see him halfway across the room, pulling my Mother's homemade medical kit down from the top shelf of the pantry.

"So seriously Katnip, what happened?" Gale asks as Peeta sets me gingerly onto the counter and brushes a strand of hair away from my bloody forehead and tucks it behind my ear.

"I told you," I swallow as I raise my eyes to Peeta's, and find myself slowly trailing them down to his lips. "I had an accident in the woods."

"Yeah," Gale says. "I heard that part – what happened?" he asks, his head downcast as he looks for the right supplies.

"I fell," I tell him, still looking at Peeta's lips, unable to pull them away. "I was hunting a deer – I hadn't seen one for over a year – and right as I was about to shoot the branch I was perched on snapped under me. I don't know how long I was out before I woke up," the sound of Gale's approaching footsteps force my eyes from Peeta's lips, and I feel his hand pull away from mine. Huh. I hadn't even noticed it was there.

"Okay," Gale sighs as he steps in front of me. "Girl-Who-Can-Take-Care-Of-Herself, let's see if we can't fix you up," he smiles as he places his hand against the top of my head to hold my hair back.

"Hey, watch it," I tell him as he wets a cotton swab into a small dish containing one of my Mother's tonic's for cuts. "I was a champion in the Seventy-forth annual Hunger Games; I can kick your ass any day," my voice hisses as he places the soaked swab against the gash.

"I know," he laughs softly as he continues working on my cut. "I'm only teasing. Hey Peeta," he adds as he looks into my eyes. "Can you go upstairs into the spare room, and in the bathroom you'll find a roll of white gauze. Can you bring it down here?"

"Yeah," Peeta nods as he backs out of the room. "Yeah sure. I'll be right back."

"Gale what are you doing?" I ask as I watch Peeta leave the room. "There is no gauze upstairs, my Mom leaves everything down here so her and Prim are always prepared," I remind him.

"I know that Katniss," he says as he re-wets the swab. "I just wanted to have a few minutes with you."

I smile. "Okay, what's up?"

"What I can't ask to have a few minutes of alone-time with my girlfriend?" he asks, as he dabs at my forehead with a bit more force than before.

"Ouch!" I cry out as my head jerks back. "And you know that's not what I meant."

"I'm sorry, Katniss, I'm sorry… I know… I…" he trails as he drops the swab onto the counter and bites his balled fists between his teeth and walks away from me, his free hand cupped around his hip.

"Gale, what's wrong?" I ask as I look over at him, my eyebrows furrowed together.

"What's wrong?" he repeats as he pulls his hand from his mouth and looks down at the ground, shaking his head. "What's wrong is the Katniss I know would never hurt herself like that in the woods. What's wrong is the Katniss I know doesn't… she doesn't…" he trails, turning away from me again and raising his head toward the ceiling.

"I'm human Gale – nobody's perfect," I say softly as I drop myself back to the floor, and call out as my knee screams out its protest.

"Be careful!" he says as he whips himself around and rushes toward me, scooping me into his arms and plopping me back onto the counter. "I know nobody's perfect, Katniss," he says as he begins re-dabbing my head. "I just wish you were… I just wish you were honest with me."

"Of course I'm honest with you Gale."

He smiles briefly at me before focusing back onto my cut. "No, you're not honey."

"Yes I am," I protest. "Of course I am, I've never lied to you about anything. Ever," I say as I look up into his eyes. "Ever."

"Being honest and lying are two completely different things," he tells me as he takes a white cloth and gently dabs it across my forehead. "Like I love you, Katniss, I will always love you. But that can't mean anything if you have feelings for somebody else."

"Gale, I-"

"Don't," he cuts me off. "Just please, don't. You can't tell me you don't remember what you dream about," I feel all the blood drain from my face at his words. I feel ashamed to look at him. He nods before going on. "Yeah, I didn't think so."

"Gale…"

"It's kind of hard to sleep through your girlfriend calling out another man's name in her sleep," he goes on. "Trying to pull you back into my arms – trying so hard because I love you so much – but feeling my heart break as you push me away, screaming out his name. What were you so distracted by?" he asks as he forces me to look at him. "That made you fall in the woods?"

"Gale," I beg, feeling tears fill my eyes. "Please, I-" his look is enough to silence any false answer. "Peeta," I tell him. "I was thinking of Peeta... But Gale, don't-"

He places his index finger across my lips and smiles as he patches up my forehead. "You were staring at his lips just now," he whispers as he lets out a deep breath. "That's also kind of hard to notice. And the hand-holding," he adds, and lifts my chin with his hand to meet his eyes. "Listen, Katniss, I know you love me, and I know you always will… But tell me you don't love him the way you're pretending to love me? Tell me you don't look into his eyes and wish he were the one holding you instead of me. Tell me every time you call out '_I love you!'_ in your sleep you're saying it to me, and not to him," he goes on, and I wipe at the tears before they can fall. "That's why he's here, you know," he tells me. "I figured it was high time I told the guy who's been in love with you his whole life that you love him back."

"Gale," I practically sob as I place my hand onto his chest. "I just want you to be happy."

"And _I_ just want _you_ to be happy," he tells me as he takes my hand into his while pulling it from his chest. "And you're not with me. Hell, you're not even _with_ me… I lost you the moment you stepped onto that train and into his arms."

"Gale, no, nothing like that even happened until we were in the arena, and after we had been told there could be two victors from the same district," I tell him.

"Katniss," he breathes as he looks down at me. "Just, let yourself be happy! Stop trying to force something that isn't! I see the way you look at him, and how your eyes light up at the mention of his name!" he shouts. "I know you want to be with him, so, so then why won't you just let yourself be? Because of me?" he asks. "Katniss, you've known me a long time – I'm tough – I'll get through it. I mean, yeah it'll hurt, but not forever. Just stop thinking of what I want and focus on what you want for once.

"Your entire life all you've ever done is tried to make other people happy. You're seventeen, I think it's about time you focus on yourself for once. And not only you, but Peeta too. It kills him to see us together, and especially knowing that it is him that you really want to be with," he smiles as he cups my face between his hands and leans in and kisses me. "Be with the person you want, Katniss," he whispers softly. "Not with the person who you think you have to be."

I watch as he walks away.

TBC


	3. Part III: You Are Home

**Home**

Part III: You Are Home

**Katniss's POV**

Tears run freely down my cheeks as I harshly dab at my knee, my jeans now torn completely open from the knee down to allow plenty of open space to work with. I am sitting with my feet on the counter and I lean forward, examining my knee closer as the tonic cleans away more and more of the dried blood. The cut itself is anything but clean, zigzagging and widening and thinning out, making it impossible to tell what exactly did the damage. My head was easy; clearly a rock. But this? It looks like it was sliced at and cut open all at once, while also being lightly scratched at with a dull needle. There are even places on it where I can clearly make out white bone, which isn't all that surprising, with it being my knee and all.

My hands begin to shake as I hold my gaze on the wound…

"_You're going to be fine," I say as I examine Peeta's thigh, but know what I am saying is nothing but empty words. "It's not even that bad." _

"_Katniss," he tells me softly as he pulls my hand into his own, and laces our fingers together. "I can tell when you're lying," I pull my eyes from his leg and look over at him. It is almost automatic now as I crawl myself next to him and snuggle up against his chest. "Just stay with me," he whispers as I feel his lips graze over my hair. "Just please stay with me." _

_I lift my head away from his chest and look over at him. "Okay," I tell him softly as I run my free hand into his hair. "I'll stay," I say as he brings his lips to mine… _

"Peeta," I whisper to myself, falling from the memory and back into reality. "Peeta," I say again as I open my eyes and look down to the floor beside me, hugging my left knee to my chest and leaning the side of my head into it. I can feel warm blood trickling from my knee down my shin, but at the moment I don't really care or pay it any attention.

"Well," comes Peeta's voice, and I pull myself away from my knee and begin dabbing at my knee once more. "I looked and I looked, but this gauze you asked about is nowhere to be found," he sighs as he marches into the kitchen.

"That's probably because it isn't there," I tell him softly as I pull my knee closer to myself.

"Oh, well that would probably explain it," he nods as he walks over to the kitchen table and pulls out a chair. "Where'd Gale go?" he asks, looking over at me.

"Home," I tell him as I look over at him for a moment, then focus back on my knee, dabbing roughly at the shredded skin. "_Ouch!_" I hiss as the cotton swab sends a sliver of hidden wood deeper into my flesh. I set the swab down and attempt to pick at the shard of wood with my fingernails, but end up only ripping at my loose flesh, causing stinging pain to spread throughout my leg. I call out and slap my face into my hand.

"Sometimes brute strength isn't what you need," Peeta says as he pulls himself up and walks towards me. "Sometimes what you need is a gentle touch," his eyes are locked with mine as he places his hand onto my bare calf. I watch as he picks up a pair of tweezers and leans his face in towards my knee.

He runs his hand over my cheek while setting the tweezers back down and tossing the wooden shard into the trash. He picks up the cotton swab and begins dabbing at the wound painlessly.

"I can't really afford to be gentle," I tell him as he continues his work on my knee.

"Maybe you just haven't felt safe enough to let down your guard," he suggests as he looks over at me. "You don't always have to be the one to protect people – sometimes you need to let them protect you."

"In the world we live in I'm not really willing to take that chance," I tell him as he gently dabs my knee with a sterile white cloth. Still, I feel no pain.

"In that cave you seemed to feel pretty safe to me," he says. "And we were surrounded by more danger in that arena than most people will face in a lifetime," he sets down the cloth and begins wrapping my knee in white gauze.

"Peeta," I say softly as I reach out my hand and take his. "I could use your gentle touch again," he looks down at my hand, and turns it over and kisses the back of it. Without speaking, he brings the cotton swab into my hand and cleans the cut. As he finishes, he throws the swab into the trash and slowly, gently wraps my hand in gauze, sealing it with a kiss and a gentle rub.

"There," he says softly as he runs his hand over my cheek, looking lovingly into my eyes. "Good as new."

"Peeta," I whisper as I catch his hand before it falls from my shoulder. He looks at me, his eyes trailing from my eyes to my lips, and back again. "My guard's down," I tell him, and he runs his hand back up to my cheek and cups it.

"I'll never give you a reason to put it back up," he tells me, leaning his head into mine.

After we kiss, he carries me up the stairs.

THE END


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